Meatless "Meat"balls Done Three Ways

This holiday season we went for some unique choices for our main courses as we try to cut down our meat consumption. I made my first vegetarian nut loaf for Christmas, which I will not share with you since it was weird and made me sad. However, for New Years Day I scored BIG on my "meat"balls. I adapted a recipe I found at Very Innovative Parties and my guess is this will be a "go to" recipe in the future for me. I cooked them with a sweet and sour sauce, recipe below as well. 

Here is the basic recipe for the "meat"balls: 

5 eggs(yes, you need them all) 

3/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese (Tillamook cheddar is my favorite, but any cheese would work)

1/2 of a medium onion, roughly chopped

1 cup nuts (walnuts or pecans)

1 tsp dried basil

1 tsp dried sage

4 slices of any nutty whole wheat bread (torn by hand works fine, pretty small pieces)

1. Mix all ingredients in a food processor till well blended if you have one. I don’t have a food processor so I used my braun hand mixer, start with the nuts and onion and blend until paste like, then add the other ingredients and mix by hand.  

2. The mixture will be wet, but you should be able to scoop up a bit and form it into a ball. If not, add more breadcrumbs. I used 1/4 cup of Italian breadcrumbs from my pantry. Form into balls, a small ice cream scooper works well, then place in a baking dish. It’s ok if they’re touching and spread a little.

3. If you are going to use them in place of meatballs with pasta or to bbq, they can be cooked plain at 350 degrees for about 30-40 minutes. They are done when lightly toasted and dry to the touch. The "meat"balls can be used immediately or frozen. 

Sweet and Sour Sauce:

Follow the recipe above until step 2, then make the following sauce:

1/2 cup olive oil

1/4 cup vinegar

1 cup apricot jam or preserves 

1 cup ketchup

1 tsp oregano or basil

Dash of hot sauce (or more)

1. Mix all ingredients in a medium bowl, whisking till well blended.

2. Pour over the prepared meatballs, being sure to cover all of them.

3. Bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes.

4. These can be served the day they are made, but they are actually better the next day. 

Two other uses for the "meat"balls:

Put the already cooked balls in a crockpot and cover with BBQ sauce. Cook until heated through. Serve as a main course with sides of your choice.

Add balls to a jar of spaghetti sauce and serve over pasta. 

Expectations of Christmas Past

I grew up in a small town on the Missouri River, as did my parents, and their parents before them. Every Christmas Eve my mom would clean the house and my dad would go out to the store for food. The house was ready, Jack and I waiting with barely containable excitement, and a spread had been laid out for the guests:  cold cuts, wonder bread, Ruffles potato chips, beer, pop, and lots of homemade sweets. The relatives would descend on our house, grandmas, aunts, uncles, cousins, sometimes from both my mom's and my dad's side of the family.

After opening presents the kids would watch television or play games and the adults would stay at the kitchen table drinking and playing poker. We would sneak back into the kitchen for cookies and to hang out if we were bored and tried to join the adult conversation. If my Uncle Ricky was winning he would lean over to me, smelling of beer with a cigarette hanging from his mouth, and he would hand me a twenty. He's still a cash kind of gifter, when he's got any cash to give.

It was a loud, raucous time and we kids ran wild. I didn't know anything else and I thought it was great!

That was my expectation of Christmas when I went out to make my own way in the world and, as Buddha said, expectations create suffering. We live in California, we have one child, our closest relative is a thousand miles away, and I am estranged from my mother. For years a melancholy would descend on me come Christmas time, but not this year.

I have been sensing a shift deep within me for some time, but it was so intangible that it was hard to know if it was real. I think (with my ever lingering self-doubt I wouldn't want to be too emphatic), but I really think I'm actually happy exactly where I am. So tomorrow the three of us will get up and unwrap gifts thoughtfully purchased based on knowing one another intimately, the dogs will tear up the boxes and shred the wrapping paper, we will eat cinnamon rolls fresh from the oven, and it will be good. I think this shift has been about appreciating what's right in front of me and letting go of expectations of Christmas past.

Wishing you all  peace and the ability to appreciate exactly what you have today. Now I'm being pulled back to the television by the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window. 

Tapping Into Atman

As a girl I sensed the atman within me, but I didn't have the vocabulary to express it. You see, I was raised a Baptist. In the Bible Belt of America curiosity about the higher self, the idea that we are all pieces of God, was not encouraged, so it sat dormant for years.

I eventually found my way to an Eastern Philosophy class at Austin Community College and my path was forever altered. Now I am the teacher at a community college asking my students to tap into their own atman on the yoga mat. I love the full circle aspect of this story.

Who are you? What is your true nature? I could make a lot of money if I had the answer to these questions. I fantasize about myself as though I'm the Midwest version of Deepak Chopra, but unfortunately I have no answers. The true essence of who we are is what I've been meditating on with my students this week, really it's what I've been meditating on for a lifetime. In Hinduism they call this essence atman. What does this word, this concept, truly mean? It's the universal self, the underlying force for all our authentic interactions. It can be tricky to find in the busy world we live in, but not impossible.

The plastic world around us reveres material goods above all else and piles a lot of stuff on top of our atman. It takes hard work and diligence to stay tuned-in and connected to your authentic self.

When I was a child I remember watching a bully on the playground pushing some kid around and my heart hurt.  Even though I didn't have the courage to stand up and speak, I was tapping into atman then. It doesn't always start with action, it starts with a knowing. A gut feeling about right and wrong.

I continued to hear the voice (that's always how I describe atman, as a voice in my head that guides me), not the voice from the self my parents told me I was, not the voice that desperately needed me to fit in, but the voice deep within...and I began to allow this voice to guide my actions, my words. The voice was shaky at first, but it was not going to be ignored  any longer.

I began to feel as though I wasn't comfortable in my own skin when I didn't honor atman. Like wearing clothes that are wet and too small. So how do you tap into this essence? How do you open to hearing your voice? For me it started with meditation. I noticed each time I got off my cushion and went back into the world that the voice was easier to hear.

Since I've been allowing atman to guide me I have less drama in my life, there is less second guessing my decisions, and I rarely feel regret. Allowing the inner voice to guide me means weighing what is not only right for me, but for all those around me as well. I think this is how we were wired to be in the first place, we just have to unearth it. So go out and be the change you want to see in the world. Or ask yourself “What would Jesus do”? Or simply follow your hearts guidance, it knows what to do if you listen.    

Friday Musings

I want to believe in the best of our human nature. 

Better to be a realistic optimist then a delusional pessimist.

10 Poses in 10 Minutes

I've been teaching yoga for fifteen years and the question I'm asked the most is “what can I do about (fill in the blank with your latest ache or pain)”. This question is a tricky one to answer because there are so many variables. I normally suggest a private session or recommend that they visit a physician, acupuncturist, or a massage therapist, depending on the problem. Another question that I hear a lot, and one that is much easier to answer, is what do I recommend for home practice when the student doesn't have a lot of time or they're traveling and can't get to a class. I've compiled a list with some brief instructions on the top ten poses I recommend for students with limited time. It just takes ten minutes a day to keep your joints healthy and to help still your mind. Here is the sequence I have been recommending to students for years, and it's also my go to routine when I don't have a lot of time:

1.Easy-seated pose (Sukhasana)-Sit on your mat with legs crossed in whatever fashion you are comfortable with, spine tall, and focus on your breath for one minute. Taking deep inhales and exhales through the nose. If you are not comfortable sitting flat on your mat roll up a towel and place it directly under your sit bones to tip the pelvis slightly forward.

2.Mountain pose (Tadasana)-Stand at the top of your mat with your feet either hip width apart or feet side by side. Stand erect with arms at sides or palms at your heart pressed together in prayer pose. Find a focal point to place your gaze on and take a few rounds of deep inhale/exhale. Try to focus on grounding down through your feet as though you are a tree rooted to the earth.

3.Upward salute (Urdhva Hastasana)-From mountain pose inhale as you stretch your arms up beside your ears, folding the spine back only as far as you feel safe and comfortable, and lifting your heart upward. Inhaling on the upward movement and exhaling return to starting position. Do this five times.

4.Forward fold (Uttanasana)-From upward salute, as you exhale, hollow out your belly and keep your legs firmly engaged with a soft bend in the knee, as you fold forward, letting your arms, head, and shoulders hang heavy. Breathe here for a few rounds. Move to step 5.

5.Half forward fold (Ardha Uttanasana)-From forward fold, as you inhale, lift the sternum toward the front of the room, rest the hands on the legs, straightening out the elbows, and arch the torso away from the thighs, keeping the neck long. Move to step 6.

6.Plank pose (Utthita Chaturanga Dandasana)-Step back the length of your mat from the forward fold with first the right foot, then left, keeping your feet hip width apart and the wrist directly under your shoulders, sinking your buttocks to create a plank from head to feet. Hold for a few rounds of breath. If you need help maintaining this pose drop your knees to the floor, keeping the plank position from knee to head. Move to step 7.

7.Cobra pose (Bhujangasana)-Lower your body to the ground from plank as you exhale, you can drop your knees if you need help lowering to the ground. As you inhale, flatten the tops of the feet onto the mat leading with your sternum, lift the head and chest upward creating a slight backward bend. Make sure to keep your hands firmly planted on the mat and your shoulders relaxing down your back. Move to step 8.

8. Downward-facing dog pose (Adho Mukha Svanasana)-From cobra, as you exhale, curl your toes back under, feet still hip width apart, and push into your hands and feet, giving a slight bend in the knees or even placing them on the ground to help you press up, pushing the body upward, lifting the tailbone toward the sky, creating a tent like position with the body. Lengthen out of the arms and gently press your weight toward your thighs, straightening the legs as you sink your heels toward the floor.

*Note:Steps 2-8 constitute a Sun Salutation A. I do 4 or 5 rounds before cow-cat pose to warm up.

9.Cow-Cat pose (Bitilasana)-Drop from downward-facing dog to your hands and knees. At this point you should be on your hands and knees in a table like position. On your inhalation (imagine the movement originating at your naval) lift your tailbone toward the sky, lift your sternum toward the front of the room, and drop the belly toward the floor, gazing toward the top of your mat. As you exhale (again movement originates at the naval) drop your head and tailbone toward the floor and round your back toward the sky. Moving on the inhale and the exhale repeat cow-cat for one minute.

10.Easy spine twist (Supta Matsyendrasana)-Start by laying on the floor on your back, legs extended. Bend your right knee toward your chest, resting the right foot on the left inner thigh, put your left hand on the right knee, and extend your right arm out shoulder height. As you inhale roll onto your left hip, as you exhale gently press the bent knee to the left and drop your gaze to the right. Keep both shoulder blades on your mat and hold for one minute. Repeat on the other side.

Corpse pose (Savasana)-From easy spine twist stretch your legs down the length of the mat and drop your arms out to your sides, palms turned up. Close your eyes and rest on your back. Allowing your body to relax and the breath to return to its natural state. Stay in corpse pose at least a minute observing the sensations in your body.

This is a good series that can be done quickly and in a limited space. If you don't have a yoga mat it can be done on the floor or on a towel. Traditionally yoga is practiced with bare feet to avoid slipping, it is also not a good idea to practice with lotion on your hands and feet for the same reason.

I Want To Be Right (I say stomping my foot!)

In the past I haven't put much stock in the whole astrology thing. I have a friend that keeps me updated on the state of the planets, the stars, and what it supposedly means to us. It's interesting, so I listen. That's how I know we just came through a period of Mars in Retrograde.

This time the slow moving Mars has made me a believer. I can humbly say Mars just kicked my ass.

For the last few weeks its as though my heart had hardened beyond the point of recognition and, ironically, I knew I was choosing this suffering. It's familiar. It's comfortable, like my ancient, tattered college sweatshirt that has been known to lead some to believe I'm a homeless woman. I'm stuck. Stagnant. Wallowing in my own misery with Dr. Phil echoing in my head, “Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?” And the answer, I want to be RIGHT! Which leaves me suffering.

Here's what's happening in my life that has inspired me to write this blog. Pete's job has been ramping up in the last few years and his stress level is through the roof. As is our human nature we take it out on the people closest to us, that would be me. I talked with him about how bringing his stress home effects me and he got it. He apologized and we talked about some strategies he was going to try to handle the daily pressures of work in the future. Two weeks have gone by and I believe Dr. Phil would give him an 'atta boy! He hasn't snapped at me, zoned out in front of the football game for hours at a time, and he's been more conscious about helping with the “daily grind” stuff...he's been present.

So what's the problem you ask? I was right. He was taking his stress out on me and I'm pissed.

I've had this overwhelming urge to punish him. To bask in my self-righteousness, regardless of the detrimental effect it will have on our relationship. It's ugly. It's not at all who I want to be, but there it is. So now, what do I do with it? I want to soften my heart. I want to own up to my vindictive nature and apologize. I find it astonishing that after twenty-seven years with Pete that I can't just own my shit and move on. It seems pretty obvious he's not going anywhere, so why not just own it? I screwed up, sorry, let's move on.

I wrote this last week and yesterday I was able to finally speak with Pete honestly about what was getting between us. I spoke from my heart and I apologized, which is not an easy task for me. As he always does, Pete opened his arms to me without resentment. He allowed me to blame the last few weeks of angry looks and cold shoulder on the God of War. Now that Mars has moved out of retrograde I'm happy to say Venus is ruling our house once more, at least until the next retrograde spins around.

My Take on Yakisoba

I like this recipe because you can use any veggies you have hanging around in the refrigerator, this is my favorite combo. You can find yakisoba noodles in the refrigerator section at the grocery store next to the vegetable aisle and near the tofu.

Yakisoba with Veggies

2 cloves of garlic

2 Tbl olive oil

1 large red bell pepper

2 small heads of bok choy (tough end cooked with other veggies, leaves added at the end with noodles)

1 cup bean sprouts (added at the end with noodles)

1 head of broccoli, cut into pieces

2 carrots, peeled and sliced

2 celery stalks, sliced

3 green onions, sliced

1, 7.7 oz, yaki soba noodles, discard flavor package

Yaki Soba sauce:

½ cup Bragg's liquid aminos (or soy sauce)

a little less then 1/ 8 cup each: mirin, worcestershire sauce, and rice vinegar.

1 Tbl chili paste. I like the sambal oelek brand. 

Pour olive oil in a large skillet or wok and turn stove to medium heat. Add veggies (except bean sprouts and bok choy leaves) and garlic. Saute until veggies are tender, about 10-15 minutes, stirring to keep an eye on the texture. Veggies should be al dente. Add yaki soba sauce, noodles, bean sprouts, and bok choy leaves. Break up noodles as they heat and cook another 5 minutes. 

Serves 4 (or 3 if really hungry)