We learn at a young age how to react to
the world. We mimic the behaviors of our primary caregivers. Part of
this is survival instinct; we want to fit in. Another theory is the
nature versus nurture controversy. How much of what we do is simply
repeating the habits of our parents, grandparents, siblings? How much
is our inherent nature? This has always been a subject that
fascinates me, hence the Psychology degree, and lately I've been
ruminating over my penchant for drama. As a youth I loved drama. For
years all my dad and I had to talk about was other people...these
days we don't have much to say to each other, but we've found an
equilibrium.
I have had more than a few dramas
lately, giving me the opportunity to practice lojong.
I didn't realize I was practicing
lojong until I read Pema Chodron today. Lojong is a Buddhist teaching
that states “whichever of the two occurs, be patient”; whether
the situation is painful or pleasurable, sit with it and wait to
react.
What I realized is that I may announce
to the world that my finger is “possibly broken” when in
actuality it's just badly injured. Yes, still a bit of drama in me,
yet when it comes to the big stuff I've learned the ways of lojong.
There have been interactions with others recently that could have
gone terribly wrong, yet I chose to sit and wait before reacting.
As I continue on this path I might
allow my drama queen to come out now and again, but at least I'm the
only one involved in my drama.
